Whether we're willing to admit it or not, most parents have at least a small preference about the gender of their baby. Maybe that's why gender prediction kits and DIY gender prediction tests — like peeing into baking soda to see if you're carrying a boy or a girl — are always trending among parents on the Internet. We try so hard to be patient, but we just want to know. Some of us have even tried to tip the odds before conception, by using a gender-friendly position to have sex.
But before you throw caution (and condoms) to the wind, there are some things you need to know about pre-conception sex. So far, there isn't any research to support a foolproof gender selection method based on sex position. There are plenty of old wives' tales, stories from parents who claim their approach worked and even a Chinese conception chart that pins potential gender on a mother's age and month of conception.
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Sure, nothing in life is guaranteed, but it's always fun to try. Check out our favorite sex positions (and dietary and timing tips) rumored to boost your probability of birthing a baby girl:
Try girl on top
Hoping for a girl? Then you might want to hop on top during sex! Again, while no single position can guarantee your baby's gender 100 percent, Dr. Ava Cadell, spokesperson for The Experience Channel and renowned love and sex therapist, says that to have a girl, the woman should be on top so that she can control the depth of penetration. Instead of "going deep,” your partner should ejaculate as close to the opening of your vagina as possible. This will make it much more difficult for the male sperm to reach your egg, since they have a shorter lifespan than female sperm do.
Do it missionary style
Turns out, good old-fashioned sex could be your golden ticket to getting pregnant with a girl. "Some believe that the best position to conceive a girl is the missionary position,” notes Stacy Rybchin, founder of My Secret Luxury. "Sperm with the X-chromosome (female sperm) travel slower and can survive up to five days.” Because penetration isn't typically as deep in this position, the sperm have a longer way to go, giving the females a clear advantage.
Rybchin's observations, which support both missionary and girl-on-top positions, stem from one of the original theories of natural conception, called the Shettles Method. The Shettles Method has been keeping parents-to-be busy between the sheets since the 1960s, when Dr. Shettles explained that male sperm may be faster in his book, How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby. As such, Dr. Shettles also endorsed "shallower" sex positions that give female sperm a fighting chance for couples hoping to conceive a girl.
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Experiment with spooning
Another common sex position believed to help couples conceive a female is spooning. And what girl doesn't love to spoon, right!? This position, like the others mentioned above, allows for shallow penetration only, therefore upping the chances of a female sperm actually reaching and fertilizing the egg first.
Because of the shallow penetration, spooning may also fall within the Shettles Method since it can keep those speedy male sperm away from the cervix.
Next Up: Time it just right
Time it just right
According to experienced nurse and midwife Carmen Kosicek, RN, MSN, couples trying for a girl should have intercourse more frequently, stopping two to three days prior to ovulation. "The female sperm live longer, up to 72 hours,” she explains, "so the theory behind this would be that the sperm left around when the egg is present would be the female sperm.”
Don't orgasm during sex
We realize this tip sounds sort of awful, but if your heart's set on having a baby girl, then it's important to resist the urge to orgasm! After an orgasm, your body produces chemicals that cause the vaginal environment to become more alkaline. Apparently, male sperm thrive in this type of environment, while female sperm prefer the more acidic one pre-orgasm. (The Shettles Method also puts the kibosh on having an orgasm precisely because an alkaline, post-orgasm vagina is less friendly to female sperm.)
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Examine your lifestyle
Dr. Cadell points to a study done by researchers at the University of Exeter in England, which surveyed 740 first-time mothers, as well as a study by Maastricht University in the Netherlands, to prove her point: "Both studies confirmed that to boost the odds of conceiving a girl, women should say yes to calcium and magnesium rich foods, such as yogurt, tofu, milk, oatmeal, almonds, spinach, broccoli, beans, cashews and oranges.
Conversely, they should steer clear of foods high in salt and potassium, like potatoes, bacon, bread, shrimp and smoked salmon. The reason for this? In short, the diet is thought to enhance the acidity of a woman's body, and thus her uterine environment, making it easier for those female sperm to thrive and survive, of course. And while high stress levels are never recommended during pregnancy, it is interesting to note that periods of significant stress, like the 2006 earthquake in Greece, have been followed by a lower male birth rate.
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Originally published April 2013. Updated July 2016.