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What your pet is thinking when they catch you having sex

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1. "I used to have one of those."

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2. "He's doing that all wrong."

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3. "Where did all these toys come from?!"

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4. "I'll have to try that with the couch cushion later."

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5. "When I make sounds like that, it's because I can't poop."

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6. "Why lift your leg like that when there's no — ohhh I see."

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7. "Can I have some?"

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8. "I sniff there all the time and she hates it."

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9. "Oh look, a sock!"

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10. "Maybe if I keep staring one of them will remember it's time for me to go. Like, go go."

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11. "So he can bite you but I can't?"

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12. "Why doesn't he understand I don't want to play fetch?"

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13. "What's he looking for in there?"

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14. "I did that to my chew toy once. It hasn't been the same since."

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More sex tips

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Getting in touch with your sexuality

Keeping it interesting in the bedroom


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